Repost: My Most Popular Blog Post of All Time

• 3 • 13.1 Training, Motivation

A year ago today, I wrote a blog post in response to a Wall Street Journal article.  I wanted to make sure that any of my readers who chanced upon the article didn’t take the author’s negativity to heart.  Little did I know that my post would become a top google search response and have several thousand hits per hour the afternoon that I wrote it.  It was even translated into French and quoted by Slate.fr.

My blog quickly dipped back down to hundreds of readers rather than thousands… but on that one day, I wrote something and unexpectedly had the opportunity to influence thousands.  I’m humbled, and grateful, because if I could have chosen one article to share with the world, it would have been this one.

Here’s what I wrote:

Recently someone called attention to a rather snide article in the Wall Street Journal opinion section called “OK, You’re a runner. Get over it.” The article, by Chad Stafko, ditches on 13.1 and 26.2 bumper stickers, on wearing race t-shirts in public, and jokes (I hope it’s a joke) that the only reason someone would “get up at 5 a.m. and run 10 miles adorned with fluorescent tape” is because “there is no more visible form of strenuous exercise than running” and in this age of social media, we crave attention and want to be seen.  Umm, right… because all the people I know are up at 5 a.m. looking out their windows to see if the person running by in reflective gear is someone they know, so they can then applaud them for it later.

Maybe we get up and do it because exercising makes us feel good, reduces our risk of heart attack and disease, gives us the pleasure of working towards goals and achieving them, and is an amazing way to get outside in the fresh air year round.

Maybe we enjoy advertising our distances because we like connecting to other runners, and inspiring people to start running because they look at us and realize how many normal people are doing it and how accessible it is.

Maybe we wish we lived in a country where more people were healthy and active, so we didn’t have to worry about friends, neighbors and relatives who are at higher risk for heart disease, type two diabetes, and stroke, and who aren’t living the same quality of life because they don’t exercise regularly.  Maybe every bumper sticker is an advertisement for a better way of living, not just a way to stroke our own egos by advertising our accomplishments.  Dear cars on the road, I see your Tony’s Donuts bumper sticker and I raise you one 13.1 bumper sticker.

In a world filled with advertising, we are advertising something healthy… something positive… something free.  And I guess, to Chad Stafko, something offensive.

In his defense, this guy is a journalist.  His job is to write entertaining, edgy articles that people want to read.  Perhaps in his world, snarky and controversial = funny, and offensive = viral.  It takes extra creativity to be funny without being negative, and it’s a lot easier to harp on some runners for advertising their joy of running than it is to take on big businesses for things that are actually harmful.  Maybe he was having a lazy day, or maybe it really bugs him that so many people are happy to be exercising.  His tone when writing about the rise in the popularity of running certainly made it sound like lots of runners isn’t a good thing.

I write a whole blog about running.  I have some good guesses as to what Chad Stafko would say about THAT.  But for every Chad Stafko, I’ve got people writing me e-mails and comments thanking me for helping them stay motivated to keep running, because they love the change it’s made in their lives.  There it is, right there – the positive impact of being public and talking about running is real.  The negative impact of irritating someone who thinks you’re an egomaniac for displaying your interest in running?  Let me just say, it’s probably not their biggest problem.

I suspect anyone annoyed by the sight of my 13.1 sticker or someone in a coffee shop wearing their race t-shirt is probably unsatisfied with their own life or level of fitness, and should do something about it.  Does it bother me when I see someone in a zumba t-shirt or with an ironman bumper sticker?  Um, no.  Not at all.  It might even give me something to talk to them about in line at the grocery store.  I found something active that I love to do, and I’m doing it.  I would be ecstatic to learn that you’ve done the same.

Maybe I’m crazy, but I like seeing people posting selfies of themselves at the gym, or doing something awesome.  I stay on Facebook so I can see my friends’ photos and updates, and nothing makes me happier than seeing my friends doing things they’re proud of and happy about.  Please – tell me you’ve taken up kayaking, lost some weight, joined a gym, started eating healthier, or won first place with your bowling league.  I LOVE IT.  If you have photos, that’s even better.

I’m irritated by this article because when I think about the impact, I don’t see any positive outcomes.  Someone who dislikes seeing people’s bumper stickers about their race distances is going to feel validated in their own inactivity, or their inability to be pleased about the accomplishments of others.  Someone who motivated themselves to get off the couch and get active in part because they were excited to earn themselves a specific shirt or car magnet now feels embarrassed that they’re proud of themselves for doing something difficult to improve their health and their lives.  That’s a lot more lame than a run-brag, if you ask me.

If you’ve found something that you love, that brings you joy, that’s healthy and harmless, I hope you do advertise it.  Get people thinking about it, show that it’s an interest of yours and answer questions if a beginner approaches you.  Get yourself a t-shirt proclaiming that you knit, or you’re a tennis freak, or you think rock climbers are some of the most awesome people ever.

Seeing evidence of your successes, your accomplishments, and your passions makes me happy, because I want that for everyone.  And the more of us who show we’ve found it, whatever IT is, the more people around us will be inspired to find something of their own that makes them happy enough to wear a t-shirt with it emblazoned across their chests.

Go ahead, Chad Stafko, buy that 0.0 bumper sticker you have your eye on.  It shows what makes you happy.

Anyone have some bragging they’d like to do?  Because if you do, I’m happy for you, and I’d really like to hear it.

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When to Squash Your Race Regrets

• 4 • 13.1 Training

Here’s how I feel after a race:

Immediately: intense relief that I am no longer running

Thirty minutes to two hours after: relief, cramping, stiffness, thirst, hunger, nausea, soreness from chafing, satisfaction, triumph.

Two to ten hours later: pride, optimism, satisfaction, jubilation.

The next day: Regret that I didn’t run faster.

That’s right.  Regret.  It kicks in the day after just about every race I’ve ever run, and here’s what I have to say to myself:

Wait, what?  I’m sorry, was that REGRET?  That you didn’t RUN FASTER?  Do you have any idea how hard it was to finish?!  You remembered five minutes after the race, when you knew the sad truth that your surge at the end was not because you’re strong, but because you could not take ANOTHER SECOND OF PAIN and had to get across that line.

You remembered thirty minutes later, as you commiserated with your compatriots about everyone’s goal pace for next year, and grinned like the Cheshire cat the entire way home.

You remembered that afternoon as you poured Moet in celebration, fighting tears of pride.

Surely you remembered in the middle of the night when you woke up at 3 a.m. in desperate need of Advil thanks to hill 1, 3 or 5… or perhaps a combination.

But how quickly you forget.  How quickly you start to analyze each portion of the race, thinking you could have, should have, picked off a few seconds by speeding up just a little bit more down that hill, or putting more into that last mile when you were almost done.

Don’t you remember that at mile 12 you weren’t sure you could even keep going, let alone go faster?  Don’t you remember Ted telling you in calm tones, repeatedly, each next step of the course because you were ready to stop and needed to hear exactly how close that line was in order to keep going?  How can you forget that, so soon?  It was a triumph that you didn’t stop.  One of the hardest, most amazing things you’ve ever done, was just that you kept going.

You remember the pain, but the memory of just how much pain is starting to fade, and it’s replaced by self-doubt.  You no longer trust that you gave it your all.  You think, perhaps, you could have given just a little more.

STOP.

There are times when it is appropriate to learn from a poor race performance, to let it motivate you to do better next time, to train harder, to race better.

But not every race.  That kind of dissatisfaction with your performance is only acceptable when you know you could have done better while you’re finishing, when you know as you start walking on the course that you really could keep going but you’re choosing not to.

But when you finish triumphant, when you feel intense relief to have made it across that finish line, followed by a surge of emotional pride because it was one of the hardest things you’ve ever done to keep going, there should be no doubts the next day.  No anger at yourself for not picking it up at mile 12.5… for surging 10 yards from the finish instead of 200.

No.

Just, no.

Celebrate your real successes.  Allow yourself to feel pride.

By all means, train harder for the next race – but do it because this race showed you how far your training can get you, not because you’ve micro-analyzed each mile and are convinced you should have done 13 seconds better.

Immediately after each race, take a moment to reflect.  Remember the struggle.  You are closest to the moments of challenge that led you to feel relief and triumph at the end.  Capture them, hold them in your heart, remember how strong you were to get through them.

Because you will forget.  If we didn’t, we’d never race again 😉

 

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Approaching the finish at the Chilly Half Marathon – trust me, I knew in this photo why I wasn’t running faster.

New half marathon PR! Chilly Half :)

• 8 • 13.1 Training

 

 

 

 

I had a great race 🙂  I clung to Tony, my running partner from last year and made it until mile 10, when I stopped too long at a water station and just couldn’t pick it back up.

Luckily for me, one of Greg’s OTHER co-workers Ted was running close to my pace because he’s injured, and he ran me in the last three miles.  Without him, I would have dropped down to 10:30s for sure… but I kept going with him next to me setting the pace, keeping me moving, distracting me with stories, and telling me each step of the way what was next to the course.  I had someone with me the whole way.

Tony kept going strong and finished with a 9:51 average when he was hoping for 9:58!  And Ted ran me in strong at the finish for a PR of 2:11:13 – TEN MINUTES AND ONE SECOND PER MILE PACE!

I ran 10 minute miles for a half marathon, and don’t think for a second that that second gets me down 🙂

I’m thrilled – it wasn’t easy, but it was worth it!  It validates my hard summer training, AND the support from Tony and Ted that I could drop my pace by 30 seconds per mile from October when I was running solo and playing it safe.

In homage to our recent amazing holiday to Paris, Greg and I opened a bottle of Moet this afternoon to celebrate.

Loving life right now!

🙂

Thanks for the comments and emails wishing me a great race!  Connecting with other runners through my writing and reflecting about running has been such a joy.  Some days, it literally keeps me going.

Thank you.

-kelly

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DSC06478 Before the race. I can’t even begin to tell you how well matched I am 🙂

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Night before your race strategy: put breakfast next to your bed

• 0 • 13.1 Training, My Running

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It’s 2 hours before I run the Chilly Half Marathon this morning and I am ACTUALLY eating breakfast!

Why?

I set it next to my bed the night before. Usually I get up 2 hours and 10 minutes before, expecting I will be eating 10 minutes after I get up.

Then I lie in bed five minutes, spend twenty minutes getting dressed, wash my face, go downstairs, start toasting a bagel, and am eating one hour before the race instead of two.

So last night I sliced my bagel, put hummus in a container on a nice pack with a knife, and set everything with a banana next to my bed.

Now I’m eating before I get ready and go downstairs, with no prep work besides spreading some hummus.

It’s like I’m learning!

Why My 5th Half Marathon Will Be Awesome

• 11 • 13.1 Training
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I trained hard all summer – now it’s time to race hard.

I’m running my 5th half marathon on Sunday.  It will be the second time I run this race, my first repeat half marathon!

The Chilly Half Marathon: About two months after my first half marathon last September, I ran my second.  It was the Chilly Half Marathon that Greg was running with many of his coworkers, and that I usually watched from the sidelines.  I’d worked so hard to reach the point where I could run a half marathon that I wanted to participate instead of watching from the side.

About a mile into the race, I met up with someone from Greg’s company who runs a similar pace.  His companionship distracted me from the physical and mental challenges of the race, and for the first time in my life I was surprised by each mile marker.  Motivated to stick with him and not jeopardize his running goal, I ran an impressive PR, shaving ten minutes off my first half marathon time from only two months before.  Not only did I run about 45 seconds faster per mile than in my previous race, I finished with a smile.

I still haven’t beaten that PR.

My failed PR attempt in June: I gave it an attempt in June, heading out at around 10 minute miles for the Runner’s World Heartbreak Hill Half Marathon.  I got my heart broken around mile 7.  No hill required.  I walk/jogged my way to a disappointing finish, my worst half marathon time and barely under 2 hours and 30 minutes.

That experience led me to train hard all summer, take the distance seriously, and run a cautious race at my fourth half marathon in October.  My goal for the Maine Half Marathon was not to take risks: I would start out at a pace I knew I could maintain for 13.1, and pick it up at mile 10 or 11 if I could.  I didn’t.  I finished in 2:17:49, slower than my previous year’s PR of 2:16:12.

Ok.  So I worked hard all summer.  I started doing track repeats several times a month.  I added cross training (and have stuck with those spin classes).  I increased my mileage.  Yes, I had a little bit of a tough fall… but only compared to how much I was training at the beginning of the summer, not compared to LAST fall.

So why I was faster at Chilly last year than at the Maine Half Marathon this year?

Because my race partner helped me through my biggest racing challenge: mental toughness.

In order to run your fastest race, you need to choose a realistic pace, but then you also need to believe you can run the pace you’re setting out at.  You have to conquer the fear of not finishing and have the confidence to race each mile, one at a time, at that challenging pace.  You need to feel and accept the pain, and know exactly how much pain per mile you can take and still make it to the finish.

I over-estimated myself last June, and it caused me to play it safe in October.  Playing it safe cost me a PR.  I had the race I wanted; I ran steady, never stopped running, and felt consistently good the entire way.  I needed that after my horrible race in June.  But expecting myself to “pick it up” if I felt good towards mile 10 wasn’t the best strategy.  I’d settled in at that point, and even dropping the pace by 30 seconds per mile wouldn’t have been enough to lead to a PR.  I needed to maintain a faster pace throughout the race, spreading the effort (pain) across the miles to achieve maximum results.

Why I was able to run so well last November:

Confidence: I had the recently discovered confidence of a runner who has just completed their first half marathon and knows they can run the distance.  I was no longer worried about finishing, I was excited to see how fast I could finish.

Distraction: I had a running partner who distracted me from the effort I was putting in.  Instead of my normal silence, which gives my brain far too many opportunities to analyze my current pace, running performance, pain level, fear of finishing, etc. – I had light, enjoyable conversation.  The mile markers surprised me.  The doubts didn’t have time to surface.  I was thinking about all sorts of things that had nothing to do with whether or not I would finish – or how fast.

Pacer: I just had to stick with my running partner, who was a very experienced runner and stayed steady at his goal pace.  There was no reason for me to check my watch every thirty seconds, so I could settle into my stride and zone out the Garmin – and all associated mental baggage.

Motivation: I WANTED to trust that my impromptu race partner would keep going if I dropped below his goal pace, but I was secretly terrified that I would prevent him from reaching his goal if I didn’t keep up.  What if he fell back because he was talking to me and didn’t notice that our pace had dropped, and I ruined his race for him?  That’s a lot more motivation than “your PR will be 8 minutes faster than your first race instead of 10 if you slow down!”

Disclaimer: A perfectly paced running partner is not the only way to achieve distraction and mental toughness.  It’s the way I discovered the importance of mental toughness, and achieved a PR in the process, but perfect running synergy is not the only way!  When I figure out how to do it on my own I’ll let you know 😉

My Hopes for Chilly This Year:

I have mixed feelings about the race – it’s been a difficult fall in terms of finding time to run, leading me to write blog posts titled “Why I Probably Won’t Sign Up for a Half Marathon Next Fall” and “Being a Mother Runner Means Sometimes You Don’t Run”.  Wow.  Sure makes me sound prepared, doesn’t it.

At the same time, I ran a steady, solid race in October, and I’ve stayed active.  My jet-lagged, champagne loving self enthusiastically ran 3 miles and biked 10 last Sunday in Paris.  I’m stronger than I was a year ago.

Besides… I e-mailed my impromptu race partner from last year, and we’re running together again!  I don’t know how long I can maintain his goal pace of 9:58, but I’m excited to find out.  I managed it for just over 6 miles in June.  But that was June, unprepared, by myself.  Now it’s November, after a summer of training and a steady October race, and I won’t be facing the challenge alone.

Last year my race time improved 10 minutes between September and November.  To meet his goal of 9:58 pace, I’d need to improve 7 minutes between October and November this year.

Dare I hope?

I do.

I am better than I was last year, I am stronger than I was in June.  I will embrace the pain mile by mile straight until the finish, and I will run myself into the ground keeping up before I quit.  That’s an attitude I lacked in October when I played it safe.  It’s time to try something different.

PR, here we come?

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My race partner and I finishing strong at last year’s Chilly Half Marathon.