I’ve been lucky enough to have some conversations with Cory Halaby, a certified Martha Beck life coach, yoga instructor, vegan, and gracious purveyor of common sense.

I recently confessed to her that one of the biggest nuisances in my life is just cleaning up after meals. I seem to spend all day cleaning up from breakfast and lunch, often shoving dishes aside to make room for dinner preparations. It’s unpleasant. It’s the smallest thing, and yet it’s a regular, daily source of annoyance in life. If something annoys you every day for several hours, it’s worth looking into, no matter how trivial.

The major issue: I clean up in 2 minute increments spread across 7 hours. Literally.

 I don’t like cleaning up, so I take a little break for social media now and again, or decide it’s more important to run first, or decide to do it once the kids are home since it’s easier to do dishes in their presence than write a blog post.

I move a few dishes from the table to the counter, then go switch the laundry. I put things in the fridge, and then I send e-mails. I’m “cleaning up” for hours. (I read all your tweets, by the way. They’re great.)

Cory helped me realize that although I really don’t have to to do the dishes until 3 p.m., I want to clean up from meals as soon as possible, without distraction, because I don’t like seeing the mess and spending hours task-switching.

I don’t have to do the dishes, I choose to. As a simple, more truthful re-framing, I have stopped telling myself I “have” to clean up the dishes, and begun reminding myself that “I choose to clean up the dishes now, because I love the feeling of having a clean kitchen.”

Reframing it as a choice makes me dread the task less.  Reminding myself why I want to do them helps me say no to distractions and just complete the task in its entirety, which is far more efficient, and then go on to other tasks.

We choose to run, too. Whether you’re running regularly for fitness or running at higher than normal intensity training for an event, we often tell ourselves “I have to go for a run today!”

That can feel stressful.

But we don’t have to.

I choose to go for a run today, because I want to feel strong and accomplished and because I want to stand at the start-line of my next race feeling prepared. I don’t have to. I choose to. I want to. Maybe I also want to do conflicting things, like lie in bed reading books on home organization and eating chocolate, but I choose to spend the time running instead because it’s important to me.

Acknowledging that running, the dishes, etc. is a choice makes us reflect on the reasons we’re making that choice. Remembering those reasons can motivate us to do the things we choose with more joy and anticipation of the rewards.

I’ve got to sign off. I choose to go to whole foods so we can eat a great dinner, and then I’m going for a quick run before the babysitter leaves… because I have to.

Jake asked me today why I run. I gave him the standard reasons; because I feel good after I run, because I like the increased energy and ability I have when I’ve been running a lot, because my mood isn’t as resilient and optimistic when I don’t run.

Then he asked me to think back to the first time I remember really running.

I had finished the Couch to 5k Program and had run (a slow, steady, controlled pace) two 5ks. I wanted to see if I could drop my time down to under 30 minutes for a 5k that November, so I was starting to pick up the pace on some of my runs.

I remember using some of the songs on my playlist to create random interval workouts for myself; when that song came on, I’d run as fast as I could maintain until the end of it.

Towards the end of this run, going slightly down hill towards the center of town, I remember that song coming on. I was warmed up, I was almost home, there was a slight decline… I flew.

That freedom, that feeling…. Jake said that’s why you run.

There is something beautiful about letting go of fear and pressure and truly running. By running, I mean a pace less than sprinting but more than jogging… that sweet spot where the pace is just hard enough to make you feel free.

That is one reason I run.

I also run for the memories; long runs especially stick in my mind and get better with time. I run to be outside. To experience dawn on an empty road. To watch the sun set on tired legs. To be embraced by the cold and then conquer it so I can feel my sweat even though I see my breath. To become stronger, so that the activities of daily life are less likely to wear me down; no walk is too long, no bag of groceries too heavy. I run to become resilient, to feel resilient. To suffer just enough to become better for pushing through.

I run because every so often, I find that sweet freedom and my heart will pound and my lungs burn and my legs will feel only joy and I will feel like I am flying and I never want to stop.

Why do you run?

After the Maine Half Marathon, Greg and I were talking to a woman who had run the half marathon at 7:45 pace and was about to hop on her bike and ride back through the course to see how her son was doing at the marathon.

She’s 50, came in 66th woman overall, placed in her age category, and was hopping on a bike to go check on her son.

Do I think this will be me in 18 years? No. But it does make you think about your long term running goals, doesn’t it? Speaking with her is additional proof that it’s possible to be extremely active and healthy for decades to come.

It means that I’m doing all this running not just for my immediate future and this race, but so I can settle into a pattern of active enjoyment that will get me to the starting line of half marathons when I’m 50, and hopefully even 60 and beyond.

It’s very possible. After all, I’m training hard and still can’t keep up with experienced runners in their 60s. This isn’t demoralizing, this is AMAZING.

I won’t pretend that aging is going to be easy just because I plan to stay active and remain a runner, but knowing that if I remain a persistent runner I can be able to run 13.1 miles for many more decades is awesome.

If you can run 13.1 miles, you can probably get down on the floor and play with your grand-kids, or chase them around the yard, or make it through a full day-trip without feeling exhausted to the point where it’s unenjoyable.

It’s not just about the 13.1… it’s about what your body is capable of handling if you’re in that kind of shape. That’s something I want for decades to come.

So when I think about my long term running goals, I realize that I just want to keep running. It’s fun to have a pace goal for Chilly this year and work hard towards it, but it’s more fun to realize that I’m doing enough just by getting out there and not being discouraged that I’m towards the back of the pack.

Sticking with it even if I never get much faster will still yield me the health benefits I’m looking for in the coming years.

When my kids tell their friends at school that they’re busy Sunday because Mom’s running another half marathon, do you think those kids are going to be like “well, how fast?”

When I line up at the start line of my 23rd half marathon at age 50, do you think I’m going to even remember the results of this next half marathon, or will I just be glad I kept putting in the miles, and am the grand-mother-to-be who can outrun most of the nation’s teenagers?

I think I know the answer.

So run like the wind… even if it’s a soft breeze.